Epic Proportions

Maybe not....but, I found forgiveness for someone today. Strangest thing...I was just driving listening to music and a peace came over me. It was an amazing feeling. Things have been put into perspective for me. My mission became clear. Things are more colorful. Outlook? Positive. Amazing what letting go can bring you and where it can take you...

Hey Kids, Ray Finkle says "Laces Out"

Eyes Closed. The World In View

When I close my eyes, I see a world of people, swimming like a school of fish. Moving with the ebb and flow of the currents, constantly changing course to avoid being consumed. When a predator comes, most avoid it, but at least one is bitten and another dead. People strive so hard in this world of reality shows, Disney movies and empty love stories. The vision of love and life is so blurry, like fish looking up from below. But when you take that chance, exposing yourself to the surface and look down, the waters become transparent and truths are revealed. I see inner struggles even within a mirror. I see people running, not in a race but from someone who resembles them in every way. I see tears that fill the wrinkles on an old and weathered face. I see a love like E.T. that burns through chest. I see natural beauty that is pushed aside for vanity and material things. I see people sitting back and wasting away, hating themselves for what they have done only to repeat it over and over. I see dreams within dreams. Riddles within a word. 

I really don't know where I was going with this. I wrote most of it last night and lost the mojo today. Damn you mojo. 

Late Night Thoughts

I recently made a friend in the least likely of places. She has looked out for me in times of need, and times of sorrow. Tonight, through her, I realized something about myself. I am not ready for anything, with anyone. There is so much hurt, anger and resentment to deal with, before I can be anything to anyone, and before anyone can truly be anything to me. I came to the conclusion that this new female attention, even from a friend, can be mistaken as something more. Perhaps it is the loneliness within, breaking through. Perhaps, it is seeing something in someone that has been missing, long before the previous relationship. Maybe a bit of both. Hard to say at this point, as I am lost within myself, or more conveniently, mirroring my Myspace quote "Lost in thought and without a map".  I do know this, I have missed the compassion and touch of a female. So badly that it conquered what I knew was right, what was best for me and what was best for my friend. 

My Very First Steps As A Blogger

Yeah....so I am officially a blogger now. I will be blogging all sorts of boring and interesting facts, thoughts, concerns etc. on my new blog. It's my blog, not anyone elses, so piss off!